Tomorrow, I head to the Fargodome for the first nursery promotion event of the year, the Home and Garden Show. That means I will be manning a booth for three days. I am also going to give a couple of seminars.

I have a little problem; I forgot which seminars I agreed to do, and I can't seem to find a list of the seminars online or anywhere else. I think they will be published in the Fargo Forum tomorrow. I will call into the Fertile Hilton and perhaps Aunt Olla can fill me in. It helps to know what I am speaking on ahead of time in case I could bring some handouts.

Handouts. People love them. I dislike them. Why not just give them the handout and leave the room? You hand them the speech and then you go through the motions of giving it. Ugh.

I have been to a few meetings lately where they have Powerpoint presentations--slides on the computer with their points laid out in outline form. The different points like "We are working together collaboratively!" zoom in from off to the side, or come together out of thousands of little bits, or dissolve into thousands of bits--all kinds of graphic tricks which do little to mask the insipidity of what is being said.

To add to the inanity, the speaker usually hands out a handout with all of the Powerpoint points listed already--so putting them on the screen is redundant, and saying the points out loud adds yet another layer of redundancy.

And oh, how agonizing it is to get stuck on slide number three when you hold in your hand 52 additional pages of slides that you know you will have to endure unless you are fortunate enough to be stricken with a sudden illness.

So, I resist handing out handouts--but it is something people insist upon. Do you have a handout? No. Well, why not?

Just to have something to hand out I had Cindy make 500 copies of an old handout I used four years ago with a bunch of smart aleck comments on it which seems to have aged well enough to use again. Better than having to dream up a new handout just for the sake of having a handout.

Perhaps I will see some of you at the Dome! We should have a secret sign. Weblog readers who come to the Fargodome this weekend--let's see...why don't you stop by my booth and say something cryptic like....

Aw heck, just say hi.