Pounding on the door

I have spent this morning trying to get a real person at two large companies. No luck. Once I got a real operator, but she gleefully sent me down the road of another phone menu. I went down the whole "please press one" road until I hit a dead end. To expedite your phone call, the message said, you will have to use our email line. Huh? Then it listed an email address. This is expediting? Hardly. For them, not me, anyway. And then the computer voice said "bye!" and hung up. Message: You will reach no human. You won't be wasting any of our time with your stupid questions. We won. We gave the appearance of caring (not really) without wasting more than 10 seconds of any live person's time.

This phone menu thing is moving everywhere. Event the local drugstore has it, now that it has been purchased by a chain. Do businesses realize how much people hate phone menus? I mean hate.

I sell trees to a couple of Hutterite colonies. Last spring, I called one to let them know their trees were in. What did I get? A recording of a voice with a heavy German accent: "If you would like to talk to Gunther, press 1. If you would like to talk to Helmutt, press 2." Good grief. That's has to be to be a violation of their devotion to the old ways!